If I Am Dancing, Roll Up the Floor
by Laura W
Summary: On the eve of his wedding, Chakotay gets more than he bargained for. More to come. Three chapters in all, I think.
1. Chapter 1

**Part One**

"No strippers."

Captain Chakotay had made his wishes emphatically known from the minute Harry and Tom had floated the idea past him.

"No strippers. No Orion dancers, no android comfort women, no Klingon rituals or Vulcan love slave holosuite scenarios."

Harry had protested. "Who do you think we are, Captain?" But the Captain had smiled grimly and continued as if Harry had never said a word.

"No porn. No anatomically correct anti-grav balloons, and no one — _no one_ , do you hear me? — popping out of a giant cake."

"No fun, you mean," Tom had grumbled.

"Plenty of fun," the Captain had countered. "I'm counting on fun. I'm counting on being surrounded by my best friends and good beer and great food. But I'm getting married in the morning to the bravest, most beautiful, and wisest woman I've ever known. I've been waiting eight years to get to this day. I intend to show up tomorrow morning clear-headed and sober so I do not miss a single second of anything that happens. Tomorrow is the going to be the best day of my life. And I will not let anyone, especially not the two of you, jeopardize it. Understood?"

He'd fixed them with a glare that was worthy of the Admiral herself. And they had understood exactly what their boundaries were. They really, truly had.

Harry shook his head and wondered how everything had gone so wrong so fast.

Tom, leaning against the pool table where the Captain lay prostrate and unconscious, shoved his hands in his pockets. "Is there anything you can do, Doc?"

The Doctor glanced up from the Captain, who was now snoring lightly, and shook his head at them both. "Given that his current condition is more existential than physical, this is beyond even my considerable healing capacity."

"We broke Chakotay," Billy Chapman croaked. Eyes wide with horror, he backpedaled from the pool table until he fell into an empty chair. "I didn't think it was possible. But we actually broke Chakotay. We broke him, and she's going to kill us."

"Technically speaking, _we_ didn't break him," Vorik corrected. "We witnessed the destruction in progress, perhaps, but we were powerless to stop it."

"You think that's going to appease the Admiral?" Billy wailed.

Harry sighed. "We better call her."

Every man in the room groaned, even Tuvok. "We are all gonna die," Ayala muttered.

If only Chakotay had stipulated "No omnipotent lifeforms with a grudge, a jealous streak, and the power to manipulate time, space, and the nature of reality" in his litany of parameters. Then they might have had a fighting chance, at least with the Admiral. Maybe.

Harry squared his shoulders. "Prepare to be murdered, boys," he said, and reached for his comm badge.

=/\=

 _A flash of blinding white light, and he slams back into consciousness. He sways on his feet, nauseated and disoriented._

" _Professor? Are you all right?"_

 _Bewildered, Chakotay takes in his surroundings. He's in a classroom, empty but for the twentysomething woman standing across the desk from him. "I'm a little dizzy," he admits._

 _The woman darts around the desk and eases him into his chair, her hands gentle but firm. "You should sit down," she says. She leans so close to him he can smell her perfume: Jasmine. "You've been so tense lately."_

" _I have?" He has no memory of being tense. He has no firm memory of anything before this moment. He frowns. "My head hurts."_

 _She brushes her fingertips across his cheek. "Here. Let me help you." Her voice drops to a husky whisper. "I can give you what you need, Professor." She glides behind his chair and places her hands on his shoulders. "Relax."_

 _And for an instant, he does just that._

 _She kneads the tense muscles of his shoulders and caresses the nape of his neck. He sighs and rests his head on the back of the chair. When she bends close to him, practically surrounding him with her body, a lock of her hair brushes the side of his face._

 _He strategically folds his hands in his lap … and feels the ring on his left hand._

 _He glances down at it. It's heavy. Black and silver. Titanium and carbon fiber. A tiny infinity symbol etched inside. He can't see it, but he knows it's there._

 _With a jolt, he leaps from the chair._

" _You need to go, Ensign," he says, his back turned to her._

" _But —"_

" _Class is over." He retrieves a stack of PADDs from the desk. "I'll see you on Tuesday."_

" _Professor, I —"_

 _He finally turns to face her. "Tuesday. And if you have any questions about the material or the assignments, you can talk to my teaching assistant from now on."_

 _The young woman pouts. "What does Admiral Janeway have that I don't have?" she whines._

 _He smiles. "Experience," he says. "Dismissed."_

 _The young woman huffs, grabs her belongings, and stalks out the door._

 _A disembodied male voice booms through the classroom. "Too easy," it says. "That whole student/teacher ethics thing. I'll never understand why you humans are so concerned about power differentials when you're all equally puny."_

 _Chakotay slams the PADDs to the desk. "Damnit, Q, you take me back to —"_

 _The room disappears with a loud pop and a flash of blinding white light._

=/\=

"He did WHAT?"

Tom gulped. He couldn't remember the last time he'd heard that particular tone in the Admiral's voice. From the looks on the other faces in the room, no one could. "I said, he challenged Q to a drinking game."

"I heard you, Tom. I know what you said." She stalked toward him, eyes flashing. The rest of the men in the room shifted away from her simmering wrath like grasses yielding to the wind. "I just can't believe it. Chakotay is many things, but he's not dumb. Certainly not dumb enough to challenge an immortal to a drinking game. _No one_ is that dumb."

Tom searched the crowd for an ally. The knot of women who had beamed in with the Admiral from the pajama party across town remained silent. Seven, clad in a comically baggy union suit, gave him a cold look and locked her hands behind her back. B'Elanna shook her head at him. Despite the gravity of the situation, he smirked at his wife's cat-covered flannel pajamas. She scowled and bared her teeth. _No help there._

Harry and Ayala pretended to be very interested in the bar's wooden paneling. Billy Chapman looked like he might throw up. Finally, Tom caught Tuvok's eye. The Vulcan squared his shoulders. "Not dumb, Admiral. Proud."

Janeway whirled on her old friend, the edges of her black silk robe whipping around her knees. "Explain that, Tuvok. And make it a good one."

"Q taunted him about his relationship with you. He claimed the Captain was … not worthy of your affections. Which, if I am not mistaken, has been point of contention between them for some time."

Janeway stared at him long and hard. "I'm not sure how the hell you know that, but go on."

"The Captain became … emotional."

"Enraged, more like," Harry offered.

"Loudly enraged," Billy Chapman said.

"And violent," Vorik added.

Ayala stepped forward. "He actually wanted to fight Q, but we talked him out of it."

"But you couldn't talk him out of the drinking game?" The men all gave her sheepish looks. "Did it occur to any of you that Q might slip something dangerous into his drink? Something that might render him … well, render him like _that_?" She pointed across the room to where the Captain sprawled on the pool table, a thin line of drool trailing down his cheek.

Tom shuffled his feet. "We'd all had a few by then … "

"No one had a detox hypo?"

The Doc cleared his throat. "I do. I mean, I did. I administered it as soon as Chakotay slumped over. It had no effect beyond removing the alcohol from his system and he did not regain consciousness."

"Was that before or after Q snapped his fingers and disappeared?"

There was a momentarily silence, then Harry spoke up. "After? I'm pretty sure it was after."

Janeway pinched the bridge of her nose. "Somebody tell me every single detail of what happened from the second Q appeared in this room."

No one said a word.

The Admiral slapped her hand on the nearest table. " _Thomas Eugene Paris, you report. You report right the hell now or so help me I will bust you back to Cadet so fast your head will spin."_

Thomas Eugene Paris reported.

=/\=

 _A flash of blinding white light, and he slams into consciousness._

 _He opens his eyes. He is seated on a hard, plastiform chair that is vibrating slightly beneath him. There's a hum in his ears and the faint smell of industrial cleaner._

 _A public transport vehicle._

 _How did he get here?_

 _He frowns out the window at the passing scenery. It's dark and flat and so nondescript he has no idea what planet he's on._

 _Something touches the inside of his knee, and he yelps._

" _I thought you'd never wake up," the woman next to him purrs. She has her long legs crossed so that her left foot is dangling within a centimeter of his calf. She is slim and tall and has the markings of a Trill. She gives him a once-over that raises every hair on his body. "Captain Chakotay, if I'm not mistaken."_

 _He nods. "That's right." He gives her a wary look. "And you are … ?"_

" _A fan. A very big fan. I was hoping you'd wake up before we got to the temple ruins."_

" _Is that where we're going?"_

" _Is that where you want to go? Or maybe you'd prefer to make a detour first?" She touches her toe to his leg again, this time a little higher. He squirms. "I'd love to show you the sights."_

" _I have my assignment. My evening is pretty packed." He raises the PADD in his left hand as if to demonstrate his busy schedule. Or is it to prolong the flirting — and the stroke to his own ego? He's not sure._

 _The ring on his finger shines in the transport's artificial lighting._

 _Black and silver. Titanium and carbon fiber. A tiny infinity symbol etched inside. He can't see it, but he knows it's there._

 _He stares at the ring for a long moment. It means something, that ring. Something more important to him than anything happening in this transport car. He shakes his head and shifts away from the woman. "I appreciate the invitation, but I'll pass."_

 _The woman sighs. "Too bad. What does Kathryn Janeway have that I don't have?"_

 _Chakotay smiles. "Discretion," he says._

 _The woman scowls at him, rises on her long, long legs, and moves to another seat._

 _A male voice booms through the transport car. "All right, that one was much too obvious. 'I'd love to show you the sights?' Even you wouldn't fall for a ridiculous line like that."_

 _Chakotay lunges to his feet. "Q, if you don't make this stop I'll —"_

 _There's a loud pop and a flash of white light, and the transport car disappears._

=/\=

 **End of Part 1**


	2. Chapter 2

**Part Two**

"We talked to him about it before the rehearsal this afternoon," Tom began. "He was really clear that he didn't want anything … special."

"That's right," Harry added. "He just wanted to spend the evening with friends having a few beers, maybe playing a little pool. Nothing too over the top."

B"Elanna, hovering near the pool table where her oldest friend lay in his supernatural stupor, snorted. _I bet that's right. He doesn't want anything to screw up tomorrow. But now this._ She wiped the drool from his cheek with the cuff of her flannel pajama sleeve. _Poor guy._

"And that's what we were doing," Tom continued. "We all got here by about 2100 hours and we were just playing pool and having a few drinks. It was all perfectly innocent."

Janeway rolled her eyes at him. "Go on."

Harry glanced at Tom, and then around the room. "We were swapping stories about _Voyager_." He scanned the men's faces for support. "You know, like we always do when we get together."

Tom nodded. "Just old friends trading memories."

"Reliving the good days," Chapman chimed in.

"Talking about old times," Ayala said.

"And making new connections," Vorik said, "between past incidents and the present situation." Everyone in the room turned to stare at the young engineer. His eyebrows shot up to his hairline. "Perfectly innocent."

Janeway closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead. "Tuvok?"

The Vulcan paused. "Given the circumstances, a certain amount of curiosity is understandable, Admiral. We did serve together for seven years with no indication that either you or the Captain —"

"TUVOK!"

Tuvok emitted the tiniest of sighs. It sounded to B'Elanna like a reluctant surrender. "They asked Chakotay about New Earth," he said.

B'Elanna shot her husband a horrified look. Wide-eyed, he shook his head at her. "Wasn't me," he said wordlessly.

The Admiral turned her back on the men and crossed to the table where her fiancé lay unconscious. B'Elanna took in Janeway's carefully shuttered expression. She glared at all the men in the room, furious on the Admiral's behalf. Behind her, she could feel the weight of the women's equal fury. Chagrined, the men looked away. Billy Chapman made a retching sound.

Janeway picked up one of Chakotay's limp hands and pressed it between her own. "New Earth is private," she murmured.

Tom darted forward to stand beside her. "We know. He said the same thing. He didn't answer, and we didn't press."

Harry took up a position on her other side. "He said he respects you too much and loves you too much to break that confidence. So whatever happened there —" Janeway glared up at him "— or _didn't_ happen, is still between the two of you. Always. "

As one, the men nodded. As one, the women sighed.

Silently, Janeway brushed her fingertips across Chakotay's tattoo. Her eyes were very bright and full. The room held its breath. B"Elanna vowed to find out which idiotic _petaQ_ had asked Chakotay to break that particular confidence.

Janeway finally turned to face the men again. "I appreciate that," she said.

Tom motioned for someone to bring the Admiral a chair, and Mike Ayala obliged. Janeway sat down beside the pool table, Chakotay's hand still gripped in her own. "Then what happened?"

Tom sat down across from her. "Well, then we just … talked for a while. We drank and talked."

Janeway glanced from Tom to Harry to Tuvok and back again. "And what part of this _talking_ summoned our immortal menace?"

Pale and shaking, Billy Chapman rose and crossed to face her. "It was me," he said softly. "I think it's my fault."

The men started to protest, but Janeway held up her hand for silence. "Go ahead, Billy. It's all right."

"Well, I was kind of … curious," Billy said. "And I asked the Captain … I told him he didn't have to tell me if he didn't want to, of course, but I wanted to know … I've never … I mean, it's just … " Billy sighed heavily. "I asked him when he first knew he loved you."

Janeway gave the terrified man a kind smile. "And what did he say?"

To B'Elanna's shock, Billy grinned back at the Admiral. "He said right away. The first week. The first _day_."

One of the women behind B'Elanna sniffled.

"Accurate," Janeway said. "And surprisingly mutual, given that I was engaged to someone else at the time. Continue."

"Right. Okay." Relieved, Billy warmed to his topic. "So then he said he knew right away, but didn't know how bad he had it until much later. _After_ New Earth."

Janeway cocked her head to one side. "Really?"

BIlly nodded. "Really. He said it hit him hard after you got back and after we took the ship back from the Kazon at Hanon IV."

"' _We'_?" Tom snapped, but everyone ignored him.

"It was a few months after that," Billy continued. "When our, uh, friend with the one-letter name first appeared on _Voyager_."

"When he wanted to _mate_ with me," Janeway growled.

Everyone in the room growled in response.

"Right," Billy said. "And Chakotay said when he found that out, he was crazy jealous, and angry, and that right then and there, he almost told you he loved you."

"Oh!" Janeway gasped. "But I stopped him."

"That's right. You stopped him. He said he can't imagine how different things would have been if you hadn't. Better or worse, he couldn't imagine it either way. And then he said … he said …" Billy faltered and looked to Tom and Harry for help.

Harry spoke up first. "He said he's never really gotten over what happened."

Tom nodded. "He said he knows you love him and he's not worried, but the only man he's really afraid of losing you to is Q."

There was a flash of blinding white light.

=/\=

 _A flash of blinding white light, and he slams back into consciousness. His senses are immediately assaulted with thumping music and colored strobe lights and the press of a hundred writhing bodies._

 _What the hell?_

 _He tries to exit the dance floor but someone keeps blocking his path. A humanoid with red hair and wide blue eyes. Fit, young, pale, scantily clad, and completely androgynous. Alien? Android? He's not sure. He tries to pass by again but … (He? She? They? They.) … they press their body lithe young body against him, chest to thigh. "Dance with me!" they shout above the ear-splitting beat._

" _I'm really not much of a dancer," he says, and tries to sidestep the being._

" _Come on," they say. "You've been checking me out all night."_

" _I have?"_

 _They nod and give him a knowing grin. "All night. All week! Ever since this conference started. We haven't been able to keep our eyes off each other, and you know it."_

 _He has no memory of any conference. "Please, I —"_

" _What's the harm? It's just a dance." They thrust their hips into his. He gasps._

" _I think —"_

" _That's your problem, Chakotay. You think too much!"_

 _He tries to remove them from his path. The shoulders under his hands are firm and strong, the skin soft and supple. The being wriggles against him and he gasps._

" _Dance with me," they croon, their lips close to his earlobe. "Feel the music. You know you want to …"_

 _A flash of light catches the edge of the ring on his finger._

 _Black and silver. Titanium and carbon fiber. A tiny infinity symbol etched inside. He can't see it, but he knows it's there._

 _Chakotay puts them away from his body and finally steps off the floor._

" _Come on, Chakotay!" they call behind him as he stalks awa. "What does that woman have that I don't have?"_

You really don't want me to answer that _, he thinks. "Dignity," he says. "Dignity."_

 _A booming voice drowns out the dance music. "I really thought that one might work," the voice says. "How disappointing."_

" _Go to helll, Q!"_

" _Oh, stow it, Chuckles."_

 _There's loud pop and a flash of white light, and the nightclub disappears._

 **End of Part Two**


End file.
